When you say ‘ATM’ to a porn star, she doesn’t think of a cash dispenser. Aurora Snow explains the industry’s down-low lingo. And what’s this about piña colada mix?
Next time you stop by the set of a porno film, you might be pleasantly surprised to hear that we’re discussing very innocent things—girls, baked goods, maybe something about an ATM.
But like every other industry, porn has its own secret lingo, and we’ve been known to put a filthy spin on some very normal words. Back in the day, lay people weren’t in the loop, but lately they’ve been catching on. (I don’t mean actors who lay people, I mean civilians.) Still, some of the definitions below may still surprise you, or maybe gross you out.
Warning: not for the faint of heart.
In porn, no matter how old the woman is, she is always referred to as “girl” on set. The word woman sounds too old, frankly. And in porn the younger the better—aging isn’t recommended. However, this can sometimes lead to uncomfortable-sounding stage directions for those aren’t used to the terminology.
I’ve had a lot of facials in my life, both on set and outside of porn. The ones on the outside are in a spa-like setting, with an esthetician gently applying lotions and masks. Getting a “facial” on set, though, means having a face full of nut butter from a male performer, which some women swear gives them a great complexion. The trick is to smile and hope he misses the eyes. I’ve had it in my eyes before. It doesn’t sting much, but Visine does not take the red out. Fun fact: facials, in the porn sense, aren’t a new concept: the facial makes its first appearance in classic literature in 1785 in Marquis de Sade’s The 120 Days of Sodom.
This piece of jargon is pretty common on mainstream movie sets: “director of photography,” or head cinematographer. There’s even a category for it at the Oscars! Of course, in porn, the abbreviation holds a far different xxx meaning: “double penetration.” Fairly standard practice for those actresses who take in the behind, this move involves the cooperation of one woman with two men simultaneously occupying the muff and the tush. We’re not holding our breath for any inclusion at the Academy Awards.
Every time I walk into a bakery and read the words “cream pie,” I giggle to myself, because I’m not thinking of the cream pie your grandma used to bake for you. I’m thinking of the porn term—one word, not two—which has changed my eating habits considerably. This one is an internal squirt of a man’s custard straight up the female canal. The actors try not to shoot it too deep, as the real intention behind this move is to pull out and then show it off for the camera.
Literal translation: ass-to-mouth. In this maneuver, after a few dips in the chocolate tunnel, the schlong is taken directly to the girl’s mouth for some oral action. It’s in these moments, especially, that we all hope things “back there” are squeaky clean. It’s embarrassing when that’s not the case, but sometimes it cannot be helped. Definitely a moment when a performer hopes their scene partner hasn’t eaten the day before and did a lot of enemas beforehand.
6. Money Shot
This is an easy one. “Money shot,” in cinema, is used to refer to a particularly moving or pivotal shot in a scene. In porn lingo…well, you can see where I might be going with this. No porno is complete without the climatic male orgasm. It’s the most important part of a boy/girl scene, the moment of pay-off. The bigger the money shot, the more in demand a male performer can become. (Peter North is notorious for his human fountain.) When the director yells for a “set up to pop,” the performers know their scene is almost over and the camera operator knows to watch for that crucial shot. If a guy messes up the shot or has performance anxiety, it’s not uncommon to call in a stunt double just for this. As a last resort, some directors will use a combination of Cetaphil and piña colada mix to fake it. I have had Cetaphil in my mouth quite a few times; I’ve had more soap in my mouth as an adult than I ever had as a kid.
Double Vaginal Double Anal. A nearly impossible move to pull off requiring simultaneous quadruple penetration of a woman: two schlongs in the cooter and two in the caboose. It requires that four men occupy the same two small areas, while also making room for the camera man to film. I’ve heard legends that someone somewhere has done a DVDA, but I’ve never seen the proof. DVDA was popularized when South Park’s creators, Matt Stone and Trey Parker, included a simulated scene in their 1997 porn spoof, Orgazmo. (They also named their band after this near mythical move.)
Fake internal pop, often filmed for the soft-core portion of a scene (no penetration required), is exactly what it sounds like. The male performer makes a face of ecstasy and the female performer pretends to receive an internal injection of his DNA. If you watch late night cable, or Skinemax, you may see a lot of these—I find the facial expressions amusing.
9. Dirt Pipe Milkshake
An internal pop shot administered to the derriere and then slurped out by some lucky scene partner, or fed to the girl herself. On the bright side, there’s no need to worry about baby-making with this move. Definitely a moment when a performer hopes their scene partner hasn’t eaten the day before and did a lot of enemas beforehand. I’ve been on set and seen some cookies in a girl’s milkshake. It’s also embarrassing to be that girl, but sometimes it cannot be helped.
Thanks to my career in porn, when I hear certain words, my mind automatically goes to the naughtiest place I can think of. I can never again look at ATM the same way! Every time I pass a bank and see one, I giggle like a grade-schooler. I even bought a t-shirt with an ATM logo, finding a certain humor in it, only to later find out the logo represents a football team from a Texas University. So I may no longer see the world through rose-colored glasses, but at least the world I see thanks to my xxx education is one that is much more amusing.
Frank Ocean Goes Polaroid for Band of Outsiders
This story was copublished in partnership with The Daily Beast.
Frank Ocean has officially gone high fashion. He’s the face of Band of Outsiders’s Spring/ Summer 2013 campaign, which was released in a series of Polaroids on Wednesday. In the photographs, which were shot by the brand’s designer, Scott Sternberg, Ocean wears several looks from the collection.
In one picture, Ocean reclines in a tuxedo on a park bench in Downtown Los Angeles; in another he lies listlessly on a grass lawn — in a third, he sits in a poncho on a cement stoop. And Ocean looks good in the clothes: afterall, he wore a yellow Band of Outsiders suit onstage during his performance at the Grammys last month.
Ocean joins a long line of stars that have appeared in campaigns for the brand. The painter Ed Ruscha rode a motorcycle in a campaign last year – and Michelle Williams, Kirsten Dunst, Andrew Garfield and Amy Adams have all made cameos in Sternberg’s now-famous Polaroid campaigns in the past.
The Fall 2012 campaign featured Josh Brolin as a modern cowboy. At the time, Sternberg told us that there would only be two more Polaroid campaigns, and that afterwards he would publish a book of them. “It’s time to close the chapter on the Polaroids,” he told us. “It’s time to evolve.”
How Much is Anna Dello Russo’s Wardrobe Worth? We Did the Math.
ALEXANDER MCQUEEN FALL 2013 RTW